When Dates Conflict or - When It Rains, It Pours

Against my better judgement, I took a small single day event several months out. A couple of weeks later, right before the contract returned, I had an inquiry. It was an extended run event in a desirable locale. It fell over the spot date. The money was good, not great, but the location would make up for that. I agreed to submit, figuring it probably wouldn't happen, but I could buy the original date out.

I absolutely hate to break a contract, even though I leave myself an out. This is how I earn a living, I have to make money when it is offered. Clients read the contract before they sign, so they know there is the possibility, but I don't like being the bad guy.

So, the extended run comes through - almost. I was told to send them the contract, they wanted to check on one more issue, but they wanted me. I did, but I haven't released the other date yet, just in case. I will know within the next week and a half for certain, but it still looks to be a go.

Then, today, I got the text that I am wanted for a national showcase. It falls over the same period. The showcase doesn't pay me, but it is a huge opportunity to be seen by some very important entertainment buyers. Now I've got mixed feelings.

One on hand, if the extended date doesn't come through, I could do the small show and the showcase. On the other, the extended date pays a lot more and I have a family and mortgage. I think I win no matter what, but why does it have to fall on the same period. I have availability AROUND that!

A bit later, I found out that the one week I have set aside in July may interrupt a full 20 day tour. AHHHHHHHHH!

Can you do it for less?

When you mention a fee, you can immediately tell some people had no idea of the cost for a professional entertainer. There is a silence. It happens in person, on the phone and even by e-mail. After the silence, the question comes, "Can you do it for less?"

It has happened a lot lately. "We loved your video, we saw you live, we WANT you! Oh, could you possibly do it for less?" I had one potential client want me to drive 4.5 hours each way, and pay me less than I could make locally. (I seldom work locally.) They even offered to pick up my gas and toll expenses...nice.

[I usually DO NOT drive to events more than 4 hours one way. I fly in for those engagements. This particular event would have required me to provide sound. I agreed and figured driving into the quote.]

I realize these people don't understand. I explain it to them. I have to be compensated for my time. You could get a local act for less. "Oh, but we've had them and they aren't as good as you." Then why do you think I would come out for the same amount AND travel 9 hours to do it?

There is more than just gas and tolls involved. I have to get up early, leave my family, fight traffic for 4.5 hours and make sure I am on site prior to the event. I have to set, sound check, then wait for the performance time, nail the show and leave the audience laughing, then wait for the event to end so I can pack up and load out without interrupting the guests. I then get to climb back in my car and fight traffic for another 4.5 hours to get home.

How do I pay for wear and tear on the car? How do I cover the cost of the hotel room if I get tired and can't drive any further? What about meals? What about setting a portion of that income back for my retirement fund? Insurances? Mortgage? Electric and phone bills? Advertising expenses? Office expenses? Want me to keep going? How about some compensation for actually having a skill? That wasn't just there - I put in years of practice - hours the other guy who you don't want, may not have done.

And you want me for the same amount plus gas & tolls. No.

Please understand, I am not saying I am better than anyone else. I have a great show and I am proud of it. I have clients that rave about my show. And if you want a comedy show that will leave your people laughing, I hope you will consider me. But if you are looking for a bargain, you'll have to look somewhere else. I have a mortgage to pay and a family to support. Sorry.

An Evening Of Comedy

Last night's self promoted show was a success. It wasn't a sell out. In fact, we only sold about half of the house. The main things were - I didn't lose money and we had fun!

The evening started with local comedian Terry Duck. I've known Terry since he was a little kid. When I mentioned I was doing a show locally, he told me if I ever needed an opening act, to let him know. I hired him on the spot, sight unseen. My wife thought I was crazy. We had no idea if he was any good. I had a feeling though, and I was right. He had the audience laughing the second he walked on stage. Great job Terry!

Mike Rose, the Magic Kinda Guy, was up next. Mike's dry wit always wins over the crowd and his Chicken Towel is a riot. If you ever get the chance to see him work, don't miss the show. The two of them warmed up the audience and made my job much easier.

Last night was the official introduction of K.A.R.L. the alien, pictured above. It also saw Baby Billy come on stage for the third time. Both were greeted with laughs. Of course, Dangerous and the Human Puppets stole the show as usual.

I absolutely love working in a legitimate theater. The audience comes to see the show and the feedback and energy make performing a joy. Thanks to everyone who spent their Saturday night with us.

Promoting the show

This coming Saturday will be an experiment. I am promoting my own show in a rented theatre. Professionally, it is known as four walling. I rented the theater, I paid for advertising, promoted the program and hired the opening acts. Hopefully I will earn a profit when all is done. No guarantee.

At one time, everybody in town knew who I was. That's not conceit, it was a small town. Now, the town has grown. I am not known locally because most of my performances involve travel. Five years ago, my show sold out the theatre. Two years ago I split the house between two shows. This time, with one performance, I am hoping to come close to a sell out - but really I have no clue how it will do. I'm not checking with the box office in advance either.

The theater is in my home town, literally a few minutes from my house. We've done promotion through Facebook, posters, postcards, Internet, the Theater's marquee and their newsletters. No radio, no print ads. A local paper with free distribution did a short article on the show. Hopefully these will combine to create a decent house.

Like I said, it is an experiment...

College Shows

A week ago I did a showcase at my first APCA college conference. What a blast, great audience, lots of laughs and bookings to boot! A great introduction to the college market.

Monday I arrived in Florida for a Tuesday college luncheon show. I was a bit nervous. This was the first actual show in the market. Prior to my arrival, I read a comment about the show on the college's FaceBook page. The college announced it and someone wrote a disparaging comment about watching the audience walk away from an untalented clown. Were they even going to give me a chance? Didn't sound like it...

Although it was a noon show, it wasn't in the cafeteria. They set it up in a ballroom of the student union. There was concern the crowd would not show up, but they did. The show went well and the crowd grew in size. In all, a very positive experience and Student Activities was happy! So was I.

Fun With Human Puppets

I have an upcoming showcase for the APCA convention in Verona, NY. The convention is attended by college activities boards. They learn about planning, scheduling, producing and promoting campus events. They also get to have a great time and see some entertainment.

The goal at any showcase or convention is to create a "buzz". You want people talking positively about you. I attended a NACA convention to get a feel for things since I am relatively new in this market. One thing I did realize is that without credentials and a showcase, it is hard to gain serious attention. So at my APCA showcase, I intend to make the most of the moment.

I enjoy designing things, so I created a new Human Puppets logo. The ten minute showcase will feature them since it is one of my most requested routines. The day before my showcase, my agent will be passing out Human Puppet buttons to help generate interest. Following the showcase I will be giving away T-Shirts with the same logo.

I had fun designing the logo and coming up with the promotional ideas. It will be interesting to see how and if it works. In the meantime, you can check out the landing page for the promotion:
HumanPuppets.com

Walking Away

Today I had a very tough decision to make. Early this year, I had started negotiations for a performance. We went back and forth and the client wanted me. I explained everything up front, and the decision was made to hire me. Then things went to the contracting agent.

I had to jump through a few hoops. Their system required certain account set-ups and verifications of my business that needed to be handled. I did everything I could to make it easy for them.

Today the contracting agent called for a scheduled phone meeting. He had a few issues with my terms. The first, that they do not pay deposits, and final payment would be 30 days following the event. I refused the terms. He went on to explain the clauses in "their" contract, and how I am protected as a contractor. I remained silent, and finally told them no thank you.

When I hung up the phone, I wanted to kick myself. First, the money I was passing up was substantial. Very substantial. So why not agree to the stipulation? Lessons of life - hard lessons.

This event may have gone fine and payment may have been exactly as described. But if not, it would have been a nightmare. And experience tells me I made the right decision - but my wallet was still screaming at me.