Can you do it for less?

When you mention a fee, you can immediately tell some people had no idea of the cost for a professional entertainer. There is a silence. It happens in person, on the phone and even by e-mail. After the silence, the question comes, "Can you do it for less?"

It has happened a lot lately. "We loved your video, we saw you live, we WANT you! Oh, could you possibly do it for less?" I had one potential client want me to drive 4.5 hours each way, and pay me less than I could make locally. (I seldom work locally.) They even offered to pick up my gas and toll expenses...nice.

[I usually DO NOT drive to events more than 4 hours one way. I fly in for those engagements. This particular event would have required me to provide sound. I agreed and figured driving into the quote.]

I realize these people don't understand. I explain it to them. I have to be compensated for my time. You could get a local act for less. "Oh, but we've had them and they aren't as good as you." Then why do you think I would come out for the same amount AND travel 9 hours to do it?

There is more than just gas and tolls involved. I have to get up early, leave my family, fight traffic for 4.5 hours and make sure I am on site prior to the event. I have to set, sound check, then wait for the performance time, nail the show and leave the audience laughing, then wait for the event to end so I can pack up and load out without interrupting the guests. I then get to climb back in my car and fight traffic for another 4.5 hours to get home.

How do I pay for wear and tear on the car? How do I cover the cost of the hotel room if I get tired and can't drive any further? What about meals? What about setting a portion of that income back for my retirement fund? Insurances? Mortgage? Electric and phone bills? Advertising expenses? Office expenses? Want me to keep going? How about some compensation for actually having a skill? That wasn't just there - I put in years of practice - hours the other guy who you don't want, may not have done.

And you want me for the same amount plus gas & tolls. No.

Please understand, I am not saying I am better than anyone else. I have a great show and I am proud of it. I have clients that rave about my show. And if you want a comedy show that will leave your people laughing, I hope you will consider me. But if you are looking for a bargain, you'll have to look somewhere else. I have a mortgage to pay and a family to support. Sorry.