Clean Comedian For Holiday Party

"We want to hire a comedian for our company holiday party entertainment. We need to be certain you do clean comedy. Is your show clean?"

"No problem, what is your definition of clean?"

Silence.

The chairperson in charge of entertainment can be placed in a difficult position. They are asked to make sure the entertainment is clean, but given no guidelines. The lack of guidelines get passed on to the act.

People have different definition of clean. It may be as simple as the lack of the f bomb. It could be a lot more complicated. A friend had a client say "Don't say anything that couldn't be said on network TV." The client later complained about his use of the word Viagra. My friend asked the client if he had ever seen a Viagra commercial on network television - which was the guideline he was given for "clean". TV is a wide open area of topics.

I don't want anyone to think that my show is not clean. I'm just trying to point out that when you are in charge of entertainment - if your company or organization says they want the comedian to be clean - get the definition. Then call me to discuss your needs. I'll make certain the comedy is funny, customized and right for your audience. So hire a clean comedian for your next company event!

What's New?

I often get the question - is it going to be the same show?

Do you really want to see something new? When you go to hear your favorite band or singer, would you be upset if they didn't do their hits?

Every show I do is slightly different, based on the fact I use an outline, not a set script. It also depends on the audience, outside factors that work their way into the show and my own state of mind. At a recent event, I changed the show at the request of a client. After the performance, the same client came to me and cried she had a complaint that I didn't do a certain routine. She TOLD me to change things.

People who come to my shows again and again have favorite characters and routines. People who have never seen me before, deserve to see my best material, honed over countless performances.

So what's new?

Well, I just came back from a two day writing retreat with another comedian. During that time I started working on two new characters. The material that developed is in the infant stages. It will take a lot of work to get these characters on stage and to the level of Wilson, Nancy, Dangerous, Patty and George. But when they do - you'll have the chance to see something new. I'll keep you updated.

Always check the check...

A stupid mistake is costing me money. I did a gig several weeks ago and when I received the check, I glanced at the amount and put it in my wallet. The next day when I went to deposit it, I noticed it was made out to: Comedy Ventriloquist. Duh...

Since I do not have a dba as Comedy Ventriloquist, my bank refused to accept the check. They can be extremely anal at times. I called the client, left a message and sent the check back by certified mail. It was accepted - but I've had no response to the issue.

The organization is made up of volunteers. The check requires two signatures. I can understand it requires a few days to issue the new check. It was my fault for not catching it while everyone was on site. It was their fault because my contract specifically states how checks are to be made payable - right next to the amount.

Today the credit card bill came and I had to pay off the room and gas used for the show. It is now coming out of my pocket - and I have yet to be paid for my time. My calls and e-mails have gone unanswered. I'm starting to get mad. At myself and the client.

It all could have been avoided by taking an extra minute to look. In the future, I will always check the check.

Feels Good To Be Back...

Working corporate shows I mean. Tonight's show pulled a standing ovation at the end of the Human Puppets. It felt great!

Long Day

Had to get up at 4:30 a.m. for a morning show about an hour south of home. Rush hour traffic near D.C. made the trip 90 minutes. After a successful morning, I rushed home to repack. At noon I hopped in the car to begin my trek to Portland, ME. I work a dinner show there Thursday night. Why drive? Why not. When I stopped tonight I was exhausted. I'd be in bed now, except I am still waiting for my dinner to be delivered. I hope it comes soon!

People

With a large audience, when the laughs start flowing, they take on a cadence. Your material stretches as the laughs fill in the minutes. Suddenly, a 45 minute show is over and it seems like you just started.

I've never been "thrilled" when working for small groups of people. The laughs seem fewer, not as loud or as long. I have to work so much harder to entertain. It isn't as easy as playing to the larger audience.

This week I am at a fair that has seen low attendance. The shows have been very tough. Last night when I finished my set, I was glad to be done. When I came off the stage, I was met by most of the audience. They told me how much they enjoyed the show.

When it comes down to it, my job is to make people laugh. This week, I actually had to work at it. Everyone should be so lucky.

Zzzzzz

It was a long summer. On the return from Virginia Beach I stopped by the Maryland Renaissance Festival to do some repairs on the Crosewl Magic Shop booth. I am partners in the business with magician, Mike Rose. It was late Wednesday when I finally climbed into my own bed.

Thursday and Friday were consumed with catching up on things that required me to be in the office. In addition, there was laundry, and shopping, and - very little rest. Labor Day weekend consisted of early mornings and long days at the festival managing the shop. It is hard to climb out of bed at 6:30 a.m. when you have been working a night schedule and sleeping late.

I start at the Prince George's County Fair on Thursday. Today I am slowly coming out of my comatose state. Tomorrow it will be time to reload the show, iron the costumes and pack the car. I'm looking forward to being back on stage - the "down time" is killing me!